Delhi........

I passed my 12th from a very small place and was able to secure 75%. I was fuckin surprised by result coz I never expected myself to even get 60%. Studies were not my cup of tea. I always considered studies to be “pain in ass” .There is direct relation between my sleep and college books. What made my 12th board worse was there was ongoing cricket tournament. But thanks to my lady luck I somehow passed. People say; don’t bribe, but tell u what bribe helps. The day my result was to come, I went to temple n bribed the god. Offered him coconuts, daily worship n everything possible that God likes. Though it’s a different thing, I forgot to fulfill my promise as soon as I got my result. But yeah I thanked God after few days n if I remember correctly half of the bribe was delivered within weeks.
As they say one problem gets over another fuckin problem pops up………….

Now for my bachelors I have to leave the comforts of home and go to an alien territory. The thought of leaving the homely comforts and going to untamed place made me petrified. Thanks to my uncle’s son, now I have to go to a place called Delhi to do my bachelors. Most people say that Delhi like a black hole it sucks the people who go there, as they most of them fails to return back to there homes. There were rumors about Delhi that it offers the best faces in India. In a way I was excited too. It was June 2003 that I was launched in the market of Delhi. Everything was new for me there, especially girls. Back there in my hometown I was used to see girls in salwar kameez, but Delhi’s flavor was different; skirts, tube tops, skinned jeans, hot pants, straight hair with dark lipstick, all was on offer and I loved it. Delhi also helped me increased my vocabs, words like asshole, fuck and new horrifying Hindi slang’s, the meaning of which I m still searching; made way into my daily use. But I must say by saying those slang’s it gave immense satisfaction. Slang’s add weight to the statements. It was Delhi that made me understand the meaning of the word like cleavage, curvy, sexy, hot and the list goes on. I mean, I know what they meant literally, but there the words got personified.
Till now I was used to hear the so called bad words from the mouth of a male but it was Delhi that made my head go topsy turvey, when I heard a gal lashing out to his male friend, boy o boy ! what a bad ass gal, her slangs were out of this world, as if she was the Isaac Newton of slangs. She threw one after another to the chap, n the poor guy accepted it. It was there I realize in Delhi beware of the babe bombs. If u messed up, u r bound to explode. And curse my luck I fucked up big time. Once I was coming from college, and there was a lady in front of me in the bus, she was probably in her mid forties, I asked her politely “aunty will you get down too” as she was standing in front of the exit door. Then came the Hiroshima Nagasaki, she replied, “Yes uncle I will get down”. I knew I made a blunder; I did the mistake of calling a woman AUNTY. This is a major crime in Delhi; u can’t call a woman aunty. Everybody around me started laughing, I felt embarrassed. I mean, what the hell ! I am 19, so what am I suppose to call a 45 year old woman. But I learnt my lesson the hard way. It was tough for me to cope up in the initial stages but thanx to my college mates I fitted soon to the Delhi culture.

Soon I moved to a residential area and started living the life of a student, or should I call it the bachelor life. Ya , I know the first thing that comes to your mind when you hear the term bachelor life are stinky, dusty, messy. Then let me tell you that you are dead right.
You see that’s the charm of bachelor life. Do what ever you want. Sleep in the morning, party at night; make life impossible for your landlord. Keep your stinking shocks anywhere on the room, so that your other friend can inhale the get intoxicated. After eating don’t bother to wash your hand just wipe it onto your friend’s bed-sheet. Don’t throw the garbage of the house until it becomes stinky enough to burn the hair of your nose and makes the life in the neighborhood impossible. I rarely noticed anyone in my neighborhood until that day. It was chilly evening of December, and we all were standing at the balcony gossiping. When suddenly something fell on the ground, one of our friends looked up in the sky as if some meteor had fallen. Funny chap, imagine the guy’s imagination power who keeps his password “flower”. Any way’s when we went close to see what was it, our eyes glowed, our heart started pounding and every one started praying that it should be for them. I never saw any of us so much excited and nervous, not even when our MBA result was to come it was a letter wrapped in stone. We all knew what it meant; some girl from neighborhood has fallen for someone among us. It was again time for the bribe, everyone in there hearts started offering God whatever they can so that there name should pop’s up in the letter

Guys gotta go , will continue the story soon……………